How Long Does Homeschool Take?

I love to remind moms that school at home does not take as long as school at school. If you can set aside 3 hour block of time in your day, you can do this. Young children have short attention spans and until about 3rd grade, they really shouldn't be working on any one lesson longer than 30 minutes. (20 is actually better!) Aim for 20 good minutes of math, 20 good minutes of reading together or working on handwriting, and then move along. If you string together three 20 minute blocks of teaching time in a day in the early years, that is enough for the day - you’re done!

More reminders for bringing peace to your homeschool day are over on the Birds on a Wire blog today!

Is There Really Such A Thing As "Behind"?

Because I’ve been home educating my kids going on seven years now, I’ve been getting lots of questions lately from parents who have chosen homeschooling as their best option in the face of unique circumstances this year. 

One of the most common questions I’m asked is something along the lines of, “what do I need to do to ensure my kid doesn’t fall behind?” 

My standard response, “Help me understand what you mean by ‘behind’…” usually receives a puzzled look. 

What these parents are asking for is of course, a curriculum recommendation or a checklist they can follow to keep their kid on track academically. “Well she’s in first grade and I’d like to know what she needs to be reading. Also, she doesn’t know her times tables yet…”

 

These parents, like so many of us, have accepted the idea that education is a race and as parents, our duty is to give our kids every advantage so that one day they might win. We quietly hope our child will gain an early lead. At the very least, we do everything possible to ensure they stay in line with the pack. To fall behind…well, we don’t like imagining the consequences. What would that say about our child? If we were truly honest, what would that say about us?  

 

It’s no wonder we operate from this paradigm. Education initiatives named “No Child Left Behind” and “Head Start” surround us. We use standardized testing each spring to crown academic winners and losers. We test, analyze, compare, and adjust classrooms each year in a desperate attempt to push the fast kids faster and figure out what’s gone wrong with the slower ones.  Each year we hand this message off to our kids alongside their backpacks and school lunches: education is a race you must run better than (or at least on pace with) everyone else…or else.

 

From Kindergarten on our kids are caught in a cycle of constantly comparing themselves to their peers to check where they rank. Anxietyand depression are at an all time high among today’s generation of students, and experts believe a high-stakes academic environment is one factor responsible for this epidemic. We have confused attending school with getting an education.  We have confused good test scores with true achievement. We haven’t stopped to consider whether winning the race equates to real success. We haven’t known another way of thinking about education.

 

Our standard-centric system was built to reward students who run the race according the rules the adults have created for them, but these same high achievers often struggle to succeed when they step off the school track and into the working world.  

 

COVID-19 has given us an opportunity to step back and observe the system. Is it still serving our children well? Teachers, administrators. and parents are all at a loss for how to proceed in this new normal. No one knows what the best course of action is right now. My hope for parents is that we'll use this time-out, this forced re-evaluation, to think critically about how we choose to educate our children. While the rules are being thrown out the window, let’s collectively take a minute to consider if we still want to play by them. 

Is your kids’ education really a race? What if it was something more?

 

So, You Might Be Homeschooling This Fall

Hey friends! Long time no see. I'm dusting off the blog
because so many families are facing a school change for the fall and I thought I'd do what I can to encourage them.

If you're new here, Hello!

I'm Katie, homeschool mom to 4 kids; ages 6, 8, 9 and 11. I've been homeschooling for six years now,  and we're about to head into a new school year with a First grader, Third grader, Fourth grader and Sixth Grader. I have always homeschooled my kids and I. LOVE. IT.

If you've found your way here I assume that you're looking into options because virtual school wasn't a great fit, or sending your kids to school isn't a good option for you, and you've concluded that homeschooling might be your last resort. That's awesome!

Maybe homeschooling will be hard every single day and you'll send your kids right back where they came from when things "go back to normal" or maybe you won't ever want to go back to 'normal". Either way, I'd love to help assuage any fears, dial down the intimidation factor, and help you figure out how to survive.

Here's a list of all some homeschool posts from my archives for your viewing pleasure. I'll be on IG a lot this week responding to your DMs and posting about our daily routine, the tools we use and what our experience has been like, so follow me over there for videos and short posts. I'll keep longer content here on the blog.

If you've reached out or DMd me, know that I'm praying for you as you make the right choice for your family this fall!

xo,
Katie


Back to the Beginning (When Our Oldest Entered Kindergarten)

How Do I Read Aloud to a Mixed Age Group?

Homeschool Plans for a 1st Grader (with a 4 year old, 3 year old and baby tornado in the mix)

My First Day of Homeschooling Alone

What We Learned The First Month of Homeschool

Day in the Life of a Homeschooler (1st Grade, Pre-K, 3 year old, baby tornado)

A Good Reminder on Days When You Don't Even Open a Book

End of Year Wrap Post, Year Two

Homeschool Plans for a Kindergartner & 2nd grader (with a toddler and an infant thrown in for fun)

The Wheels Have Fallen Off The Bus, Friends

Hard is Okay Sometimes

When It's All Too Much to Handle

Reflections on the 3rd year of Homeschooling

(Psst: Read this one when you feel like you're really not cut out for this)

How We Get Started in the Morning

The Last Homeschool(ish) Update of 2019

I'm Baaaaaaaaack (for today anyway)

Hi, friends! Remember me? (There's a good chance you don't...and if so, please just find the unsubscribe button somewhere around here and click it.) I will be totally and completely un-offended. I haven't blogged in a year so this is somewhat akin to a high school friend popping in unannounced for dinner. It's totally fine to kick me out.

But if you're my Nana, or my GranAnn, or one of my aunts, or you're just interested in re-living the good old days - let's talk!

Life has been crazy, nutso, for the past 18 months. I truly never imagined back when my days looked like this that I'd find myself here, 7 years later, wishing for those days of nap time and endless laps around the neighborhood while waiting for BJ to get home. I miss the boring, monotonous simplicity of that girl's life.

She'd probably kick me in the face if I said that to her.

These days I wake up before dawn and head out for a work-out, then come home at 7:30, kiss BJ good-bye, and tackle either work or homeschool - depending on how many kids are awake and how many fires I need to put out work-wise.

I have zero boundaries erected for work or school. If this seems like a bad idea to you, I assure you it is. I pick up my phone and respond to urgent Slack notifications during math lessons and I cover the receiver and whisper how to spell A-M-A-Z-I-N-G to my 2nd grader in the middle of phone calls about podcast advertising. Sounds fun, right?

Elijah turned 10 last week and has just finished 4th grade, during which he learned how to write a 5 paragraph essay, worked out long division and multiplying fractions and is budding into a pretty spectacular little artist if I do say so myself.

Britain is 8 and a half and finished 2nd grade about 3 months ago. I honestly need to challenge this child more but I was just grateful this year to have one kiddo who didn't need anything explained to her twice and who does not delight in living room wrestling matches when I am trying to work. She taught herself cursive, typing, and is keeping a diary of gourmet cupcake recipes that we are supposed to begin making this summer. If anyone wants to volunteer to come be a substitute mom for that project, I'm taking applications now.

Ben. Oh Ben. Let's just say reading has not come easily to my little first grader. We struggle daily to get through short lessons and he has no interest (and a stubborn streak a mile wide) in putting in more than the very least amount of effort required. To say I'm struggling and questioning my ability to teach him is an understatement. Silver linings in the academic arena with this kid include general math competency, a unique lens through which he sees the world and an infectious amount of charm. Wait, that last one's not academic.

Jude decided he was ready to read last week and is already 1/4 of the way through the book Ben and I have been slogging through for 2 years. Praise Jesus for miracles. I don't know if I could wade through that book at a snail's pace again. Academics will not be an issue for this kid. Submission to authority on the other hand, is a whole 'nother ball of wax.

We wrap up our school day around 1:30 on any given day and then I try to fully turn my attention (ha!) to work from 2-5. I am typically just finding a groove (aka done checking Instagram) right around the time BJ lets me know he's coming home and so I pivot from spreadsheets and emails to dinner and karate.

The kids stay up later these days (we were putting a recalcitrant 4 year old back to bed at 9:30pm last night) and I fall asleep earlier unless it's a Sunday night and Game of Thrones is coming on.

...all of that to say, life is kicking my butt these days. I consider dropping homeschool and/or work weekly but so far I haven't gotten clarity that either of those is the right decision to make. I miss blogging even though it's become this whole THING since I started writing because I needed contact with the outside world in 2009. It's funny that while I work daily to blog for pay for someone else and know the ins and outs of how it should be done to garner a following and gain traction - I have zero desire to do that here.

I just like this whole public diary thing. I want to connect with you guys and share my heart. I just want to write. We took at pretty epic vacation last week and I want to share the details of it all with you guys - so be on the lookout for another post prior to 2020.

Again, sorry for barging in on you like this, but man, I've missed you!

Waiting on Sabbath

My third grader still struggles to know what day of the week it is. If he asks and I respond with, "well yesterday was Tuesday, so today is..." He'll scrunch his face, give me a questioning glance and guess, "Thursday?!" 

I can't really even blame the kid. One day looks a lot like all the others around here. Besides attending church on Sunday, there aren't any major events that divide the week for the kids and me. We sleep in on Mondays and take our field trips on Saturdays. There's not a whole lot of reason to get particularly excited about Fridays, except that pizza is on the menu for dinner. For the most part I like our rhythm. The idea of rushing around in the moorings is an anathema to me...but it has been nagging at me lately that all of my days seem to run together too. There's absolutely a Groundhog Day effect going on:

Wake up, make coffee, feed kids. Discipline kids. Re-heat coffee. Teach kids. Make lunch. Discipline kids. Clean kitchen. Teach kids. NAP TIME! Discipline kids. Karate. DAD'S HOME! Dinner. Discipline kids. NETFLIX! Sleep. 

There's nothing wrong with that rhythm, but it starts to feel mind-numbing after a few years. My "work week" looks nearly identical to my weekend and it can be BORING. There's no down beat- the rhythm of the week never changes. I'm guessing whether you work or stay at home or homeschool or put your kids on the bus, a lot of moms can relate to the Groundhog Day thing. 

All of creation was designed to fit into the rhythm of work and rest. You see it in nature's seasons and as humans our circadian rhythm requires an activity-rest cycle. God chose rest after six days of work creating the universe- and then He commanded the Jews to follow his lead - "Work 6 days and do everything you need to do, but the seventh day is a Sabbath to God, your God. Don't do any work..." (Exodus 20:8 MSG)

Modern Christians mostly ignore the Sabbath commandment of rhythm and rest. I myself have never been good about observing the Sabbath, considering it something legalistic and no longer required under our new covenant. But I've been ignoring the obvious fact that many things which aren't a requirement are still really good ideas. Like getting vaccinated or exercising frequently or brushing your teeth. We do things we don't have to do all the time for the sake of wisdom - maybe Sabbath is the same? 

This past week I determined to Sabbath. I took inspiration from an Instastory post by @anniefdowns who made a checklist of things she planned to do and things she planned to not-do on her Sabbath. What a concept! The idea that I could determine myself what Sabbath should look like for me in this season?  That I can define "work"? That "rest" might even mean going for a run? All of a sudden Sabbath sounds amazing! 

So on Saturday I was intentional and did ALL of the laundry. Like ALL of it y'all. Four loads. Washed, dried, folded, put away (mostly). I made a pot of chili for Sunday's dinner. I hand-washed dishes I would usually have left in the sink for the next day. I ran the dishwasher. Come Sunday morning we told the kids they were in charge of breakfast. Anything they could prepare themselves was fair game but I was not making waffles, flipping pancakes or schmearing their bagels with cream cheese. 

We left the TV off and played cards with the kids.

We ran out to Home Depot to buy flowers for the front porch because we wanted to.

We ate lunch off paper towels.

We went to church and came home to a dinner that was already prepared.

We left the dinner dishes in the sink for Monday. 

I stayed off social media all day long. Which was really refreshing. Turns out I didn't miss anything. 

It was delightfully simple. Not easy by any means, but simple. And probably, that was God's intent all along. Sabbath should rest our souls. Should provide breathing room to reflect on the lovely in life. Should remind us that it is God who makes the world turn and provides for us. Should allow space for the sacred to enter in and touch us.

One of my intentions this year is to Sabbath more regularly. To leave some space in my life for days that are "unproductive", to give my mama-hands a break from the monotony of the quotidian tasks that fill my non-Sabbath hours. To remind myself and my children that I am not God and I do not make the world turn.

What do y'all think? Anyone out there a committed Sabbath-er? If so give me all the encouragement!  What does your rhythm of work and rest look like? What does a day full of "rest" look like for you?

Anyone up for joining me?!

Reflections on The 3rd Year Of Homeschooling

Truthfully, this year was the hardest. I had a second grader, a Kindergartener, a 4 year old and a 2 year old in the background wreaking havoc.

Jude dropped his morning nap about 8 weeks into the school year. Somedays I plopped him in front of the TV (but when I did that the others would whine and moan about the desperate unfairness of life) other days I would stick him in the bathtub and let him splash until the floor was covered in an inch of water and his fingers looked like peach pits.  On the hardest days I was in tears from his two year old antics by 9am.

Back in August my second grader still stumbled over simple letter blends and could hardly read. Motivating him was a Herculean task. On bad days (there were plenty) I thought I was damaging them. On the days when I was tempted to quit it all (probably five or six if I'm honest) and send my kids to the (delightful, wonderful, amazing) school that is literally a stone's throw away from our house, I reflected on my Why in starting down this crazy road and pondered if it still applied given the chaos.

Our Why of homeschooling is to prolong these fleeting years of play, to give our kids extended time to foster their primary relationships at this age (with parents, siblings and extended family) and to develop a love of learning that springs from the delight of discovery, not the compulsion of drudgery.

This Why reminds me to say yes to stomping in puddles and racing boats down the gutters instead of insisting on the day's spelling lesson. This Why says no (for now) to Parent's Morning Out or homeschool co-op groups. This Why says yes to a trip to the beach to see GranAnn during the school week and an impromptu sleepover on a Tuesday night with Gigi and Pops. This Why whispers, "let it go..." when I want to push another math lesson in place of an hour of Lego building.

So yes, school this year looked like role play for hours as each kid fought for the part they wanted, plot lines were debated and accepted, costumes were carefully selected and action commenced.

School looked like was an impromptu tour of the mayor's office and a discussion of local government when we went to get a permit for a garage sale one day.

It looked like my second grader's math practice to determine whether he had enough money saved up for a Pokemon book .

School happened on the beach in late November, finding treasures and seeing math and God's perfection all around us.

It showed up when brother and sister used their bodies as canvases and cracked eggs and read recipes and baked their own birthday cake. 

Looking back I see what couldn't be contained in those tidy 45 minute blocks at the dining room table. More often than not our learning came unexpectedly and in forms that took me by surprise- like a seed our lessons would lay dormant for weeks and then seemingly without cause spring up overnight and send out joyful shoots in wild and unpredictable directions.

It's only when I forget my Why that the How seems insurmountable and the chaos engulfs me. When I look back I can see that the Why expressed itself in the How and we were all better because of it.

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Lately a lot of you have asked about the How: so for those of you that want the nitty gritty, I've broken it down by subject below for your reading pleasure.

(And for those of you who don't care about the How - thanks for reading!)

We have always used a combination of curricula as opposed to turnkey, all-in-one program like Sonlight or an online academy. I am not an expert by ANY means, my knowledge is limited to my experience in the past 3 years and with 2 early elementary students, so take everything I say with that very large caveat.

We have used Singapore Math for the past 2 years. In Kindergarten my oldest used Math-U-See, but teaching it never felt intuitive, so I switched in first grade and definitely prefer it. Math is the one subject you probably NEED to have a curriculum for unless you have an advanced degree in teaching mathematics. Sequence is critical in laying a foundation for later mathematics. Elijah is right on grade level, having just finished up their 2nd book and Brit is a bit ahead, having started on her 1st grade curriculum this Spring.

I used Teach Your Child to Read in 100 Easy Lessons with my Kindergartener and it took her from a basic knowledge of the alphabet and some letter sounds in August to reading on a second grade level by April. I chose it because I had very little knowledge of how to teach phonics and this helped me understand the process myself. Once she finished the curriculum she began choosing progressively harder library reads and is now reading simple chapter books (Magic Tree House series are a favorite) She was FAR easier to teach than her older brother, which I think is more a function of the way she is wired than the curriculum I used. She probably would have had similar results had she used Abeka (what my oldest used in Kindergarten) but I switched over because I understood the methods in Teach Your Child to Read better - which I think is KEY. If you don't like what you're using, it's going to be hard to get your kids excited about it.

For history/geography/literature we have followed The Story of the World for two years. I ADORE THIS CURRICULUM. I cannot say enough good things about it. (But hey, I'll give it a try...) I love that this curriculum is not ethnocentrically focused on the Western/Christian world and that my children understood the rich history of the civilizations of Africa and Asia before we ever mentioned Columbus and the colonization of the Americas. There is a Judeo-Christian slant (for instance, the story of the Jewish exodus is taught as fact as well as the life of Christ) but my children have learned about the Greek and Roman gods, the five pillars of Islam, Buddha, Confucius and Hinduism alongside these Biblical accounts and know the role of these religions in history far earlier than I did going through school. I have purchased the audio CDs and the activity book and during our lessons my kids would color a picture or a map for our timeline while we listened to the stories. It was SO nice to have someone else doing the lecturing for a change!! Even if you don't homeschool, I think these CDs would be an amazing addition to your car collection (our local library carries all of them). We all enjoy listening to the stories and the kids will beg me to play it just a little longer when we're in the car. Maybe a different option for your next road trip?!

For spelling this year we switched to All About Spelling as I realized my oldest was not intuitively picking up on spelling as his reading progressed and he actually needed to understand the rules that govern the English language. I started my Kindergartener on it alongside of him and they are both mid-way through Book 2 here at the end of our year. For an intuitive reader, it's probably overkill, but for someone like my son who struggles to see words whole it has been wonderful.

For science, I follow the sequence author Susan Wise Bauer lays out in The Well-Trained Mind, which basically studies the sciences in the order man "discovered" them. This year was divided into the study of the natural earth (rocks, biomes, weather, landforms, the ocean, etc) and astronomy. Next year we will move on to physics at the same time Newton comes onto the scene in history. I usually purchase a comprehensive text (like this one or this one) to help guide our initial exploration of subjects within that science, and then we watch YouTube videos, enjoy Magic School Bus episodes, take field trips (this year to Fernbank and a natural cave system) and do as many hands-on experiments and natural observation as we can. This past semester has definitely been harder since the kids haven't been able to experience zero-gravity and we never did make it to an observatory for some serious star-gazing.

The kids also have to do P.E. everyday - skateboarding, bike riding or push-ups/sit-ups/squats on crummy days -which is why they have such great push-ups and plank form at karate class. Elijah  also began music lessons with my dad this year.

If we tackle each of these subjects daily (and it's rare that we do) it would take a maximum of 2 hours to get through everything with Elijah and about an hour to an hour and a half for Britain. Clearly we are not sitting at the dining room table all day every day. If the kids understand their lessons quickly, we move on. If something takes a long time for them to grasp (ahem, reading) we just keep plugging away at it. If we are having a terrible horrible no good kind of day, we stop. We play. We run errands or go to the park and I pray and trust that the Why will take care of the How.



More posts about our homeschool journey:

Year One:  We had a newborn, a 2 year old, a 3.5 year old and a Kindergartener. I freaked out and  put the 5 year old Kindergartener in a hybrid-homeschool program that had him out of the house 2 days a week and had me following pre-set lesson plans 3 days a week at home.

Last Year: I decided I wanted more control (I'm a slow learner, control is an illusion...) so I kept our first grader totally at home and did a bit of pre-schooling here and there with his 4 year old sister while our 3 year old and 18 month old wrecked our home in the background.

Shoot me an email or comment if you have any more questions about the whole thing. I love talking homeschool!

The Most Strategic Thing I Can Do in this Season

When I first began staying at home and started writing, my day was full of blank space. No one spoke to me much during the day and my only son napped consistently for long stretches of time each day. I would spend hours devouring the blogs of homeschool moms, drinking in their knowledge and their days, eager for the time when I would read the classics aloud to my child while he watercolored quaintly in a sun-drenched schoolroom. I would use my alone time to write, to sew, to bake bread from scratch and I made peace with this strange new existence through a dozen other hobbies I pursued.

Somehow those days turned into months, then years and I'm there now. I have the sun-drenched schoolroom and a son who watercolors and I read aloud. Only there are three other small people in the room with us. One is using my hair to pull himself up on my shoulders, one is crying because she doesn't like this story and one needs help Velcroing the cape onto his Batman costume. I never imagined a home could be so loud and full of constant activity. We turn from peace to chaos in a matter of seconds and my attention is pulled from one child to the next like taffy being stretched thin over and over again.

I've been writing less in the past few months, as homeschooling a second grader and a Kindergartener and managing the younger boys truly wears my brain out. The blank space is gone, replaced by smudged pencil marks and phonics flashcards. I find myself longing for those pre-school days again. When there was enough quiet to be bored and enough peace to think. Oh the irony of looking ahead with such longing only to miss the season you were looking ahead from.

I told you I chose a word for the year back in January - ABIDE.

In the hours just before his death, Jesus gives final instructions to his disciples and shares what he most wants them to grasp when he is no longer with them. In John 15 he says, "Abide in Me, and I in you. As the branch cannot bear fruit of itself unless it abides in the vine, so neither can you unless you abide in Me."(John 15:4)

I'm not much of an abider. I'd say striving is more my specialty. Constantly seeking out a new hill to climb, I don't always know exactly where I'm headed, but I sure as heck devote serious effort and energy towards getting there quickly.

While abiding sounds passive and maybe even weak, I'm discovering that abiding is an incredibly challenging thing to do. Abide means to wait for. To endure without yielding. To bear patiently. If used in another context it can mean to remain stable or to continue in a place.

If I want to bear fruit, the most strategic thing I can do is to ABIDE in Him. 

If there's any thing I hope to achieve in this season. it's fruit. But with days so full of chaos and noise, I often want to do anything but abide. I want to run away from the mess of mothering. I want a distraction, a temporary success. Something that feels better than making sandwiches for the thousandth lunch and disciplining (the same child, yet again) for the same infraction.

Counter-intuitively, I have to lean in to the idea of ABIDE. Abiding in my Lord. Abiding in this home, this calling of homeschool and of mothering. Trusting I am not missing out on greater things. That failing to publish words in other places, failing to grow my blog into a vocation, failing to become something greater in the world outside these walls is not really failure, but a success at something else. Success at waiting patiently. Success at enduring without yielding. Success at remaining stable and continuing in one place.

All that to say, I won't be blogging as much this Spring. I do plan to deep-dive into the archives and re-publish some older content I'm sure many of you have never read. I do constantly post snippets from our days on Instagram-stories (I'm @leipprandt over there...) and will continue that as it's easy, requires little brain-space and makes me smile.

Thanks for keeping up with me here in this space. Thanks for encouraging me with your words and your emails. I pray that in this season you would know your own calling with a deep assurance and be given the peace to simply and courageously abide.

P.S. Thank you sister for the beautiful ABIDE art which hangs in my room and reminds me of what I need to be doing each day. 

Hard is Okay Sometimes

"...for we know suffering produces perseverance, perseverance, character, and character, hope..." 

Being a Mom is hard.

I'm seven years into this gig, currently homeschooling four little kids age seven and under and quite often not talking to another adult until the afternoon (on a good day) or the evening when my husband gets home. I also happen to be an extreme extrovert and most days it feels hard.

The primary mode of communication around here is very transactional:

You want a banana? I'm sorry, when you asked for an apple, I assumed you wanted an APPLE. 

Please stop running your bike into the garage door.

No, sorry I don't want to read any more books right now.

No, you cannot eat your sandwich in the bathroom.

Your brother hit you? Work it out.

What do you mean you want grapes? You just asked for a banana!

There's about a 30 minute window each day, usually right around lunch time, when my brain, which supposedly thrives on multitasking and being with people, maxes out and starts to misfire.

When quiet time arrives (less quiet these days than it used to be, but at least the toddler is napping and the others know they need to self-entertain) my brain-dead brain just wants to space out. But it also craves adult interaction and friendship and community. So instead of picking up a novel or taking a nap, I'll find myself hidden in a corner (or as of this week, in the pantry...eating their Halloween candy...) scrolling.

And scrolling.

And scrolling.

And it scratches the itch. I see smiling faces of friends I know and love. I read the inspiring caption of a blogger I admire, appreciate the beauty of another adult's creative pursuits, read their words, encourage them with a quick comment.

But it's a 2D substitute for the flesh and spirit I'm really craving.

The other day I asked my sister  (somewhat ironically, but mostly completely seriously) "how do I make friends?" She deadpanned back, "I think you have to leave your house."

Hmm. Leaving my house is a complicated proposition at best, made less-appealing by the fact that I'm supposed to spend my day educating these children rather than in search of friendship.

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I grew up in the 80s and 90s, the era when self-esteem was all the rage. Those decades when coaches started giving us all a trophy for showing up and teachers stopped using red pen to correct essays lest we felt our work wasn't as good as everyone else's.

Somewhere in my formative years I internalized the message that things ought to come easily to me. And if something didn't, I ought to put it down and go find something that did come easily. In high school and college this was easy enough. I dropped classes, dropped relationships, dropped sports, dropped after-school clubs. As adults we operate in a society where it's easy to quit a job, end a pregnancy or leave a marriage that is difficult. I have to fight my innate desire to drop things that aren't easy.

I'm lonely these days. And lonely feels embarrassing and a little pathetic. As someone who is 99% extroverted, lonely is basically my worst nightmare. Lonely is hard.

Friends are difficult to make and friendship is difficult to maintain in this season. It feels really hard some days. But as I teach my kids each day, I'm discovering along the way that maybe hard is okay.

Hard doesn't mean you're doing something wrong.

Hard doesn't mean you need to quit.

Hard doesn't mean you made a bad decision, you're a failure or that you need to seek an out.

Every now and then hard is an indication that you are being pig-headed about whatever it is or truly doing something wrong, but sometimes life is hard. Seasons are difficult. And there are untold lessons to be learned in the persevering.

Homeschooling could be difficult because it's not the right season or the right thing at all for our family. Next year I may have three kids in the public school across the street. And I pray for wisdom and the discernment to make that change if we need to.

But then again, it could be that this feels hard because it is hard. And maybe, just maybe, hard is okay sometimes.

How Homeschool's (Really) Going

Some of y'all may have seen on Facebook that I took a bit of a blog hiatus last month because I was too busy losing my mind to write lovely posts about how I'm nailing motherhood/homeschooling/wifeing. The school year started out like most things do: high on hopes and dreams and low on reality. By the end of Week 3 the wheels were starting to fall off the bus.

Homeschooling has been hard. My classroom consists of an unmotivated 2nd grader, a precocious Kindergartener, a rambunctious four year old and one very loud and very opinionated two year old - who has a penchant for pooping in the middle of particularly hands-on lessons.

Learning: patterns and shapes

 Illuminating: our first names

 Discovering: turtles like mushrooms

 Baking: Brownies 101

Creating: biome models

Destroying: what once was lovely and good

 Observing: a failed science experiment

Escaping: the home part of school

Drawing: a Viking longship

Pretending: SpiderMan vs. Thor

Feasting: Like royalty

It hasn't helped that I'm very much an all-or-nothing kind of person. I laid out my August and September work-out plan right alongside my kids' lesson plans and was dutifully getting up each morning at 6am to get in the workout (Insanity...should have taken a hint there...) and a shower before throwing up a quick Hail Mary and greeting the kids at 7am.

By the end of Week 5 everything just seemed really hard. I was overwhelmed by four distinct personalities, two different grade levels of curriculum, three tornadoes of testosterone and one dramatic diva. Each moment of peace was shattered before I could sink into it. Each lesson was interrupted. Each one of us cried at some point each day.

I felt like I could ace homeschooling if only it weren't for my 2 year old. Or maybe it's my second grader who's the issue. Yes, I'd be fine and in total control if my second grader were less stubborn. Maybe both school-age kids should be in school...then I could go back in time and live my pre-school mom life! Mornings at the park and Bible studies with childcare included....Or maybe I just need a Parent's Morning Out program! Then I could ship off both the little guys and just be a teacher for the morning...I spent each afternoon replaying the morning to figure out what needed tweaking.

Week 6 ended with me having a come-to-Jesus with my second grader. It wasn't a pretty conversation, I'm quite certain I handled it badly. There was a toddler banging on the locked door while I talked to his back as he lay in his bunk above me. I told him he could do school here or he could do school down the street, but I refused to fight with him over it anymore.

In Week 7 I let our science curriculum slide. And I let my workouts slide. I replaced spelling lessons with read-alouds and we limped into Fall Break happy to have survived.

Last week was Fall Break. We slept late and read a lot and my second-grader wrote a beautiful essay about our dog completely without prompting. (Writing is one of the subjects we specialize in fighting over.) It was glorious and just what my soul needed. This week we're forging ahead. I don't really have a different game plan. I did buy candy and toys from the Dollar Store and if the kids get through school with no attitude, they can choose a prize at the end of the week.

I'm still convinced less-school is a good thing at their age. I still believe learning to pull their weight with chores and to speak respectfully to mom and dad are more important than reading at grade level.  I still love our slow mornings and the sound of their voices blending in protest as I close our read-aloud. I still dream of the possibilities that open up when high schoolers are homeschooled.

But I'm praying more and trying to hold this precious homeschool dream, this thing I wanted to do even before I wanted to have kids, with open hands.

Lord you created these kids and you gave them to us. You created us and you know our hearts and hopes intimately. Would you guide us and lead us into your best for us in this season?

Our Homeschool Plan for the Year

Our homeschool year officially kicks off today! 

Elijah will be going into 2nd grade, Britain is a Kindergartener and I've got a 4 year old and a 2 year old watching from the wings. (The two year old was refusing to cooperate with my picture efforts...) It's Year Two of homeschooling and my first year with two kids following a formal curriculum.

Since Elijah was the only one doing formal school last year and the other kids were constantly playing around him, it was difficult to keep him on task and interested in his books (or maybe that's universal to six year old boys) so I would tell him what we needed to cover each day and allow him to choose in what order he wanted to tackle things. Giving him that bit of control seemed to help. 

This year with two kids hitting the books, I think I need a more consistent schedule, so I ordered this classroom pocket schedule to help both me and the kids stay on track and know what's coming next. Here's what our actual schedule looks like to start out the year.

I've blocked out the school day from 9am to 1:30pm with 7 periods, the academic ones are 30-45 minutes long and then lunch/play outside/leave me alone time is one full hour. My thought was to mix things up so that in any given period, two kids are "self-sufficient" (ha!) one kid is doing something that requires only a little teacher intervention which frees me up to work one-on-one with the fourth child. We'll see how it works and re-evaluate a few weeks in.

Here's my plan to tackle each subject:

Bible/Virtues: We'll talk about one virtue each month using In This House We Will Giggle and The Jesus Storybook Bible 

Phonics/Reading: For Britain we'll continue using Teach Your Child to Read in 100 Easy Lessons, and Abeka's early reading curriculum. Elijah will be working on his fluency by reading texts that go along with our history and science subjects. 

Language Arts: Elijah will use First Language Lessons and Spelling Workout B. This covers all the grammar he needs to learn plus provides us with memorization opportunities (which we also have in our Bible/Virtues work) I'd like to be better about providing real-world writing opportunities for him. Keeping a journal, writing letters to family members, helping me make the grocery list etc. Fortunately his handwriting is beautiful so I don't need a handwriting program for him this year...whoop whoop! 

Math: Last year was our first year using Singapore Math and both Eli and I loved it. For Britain we'll start their Essentials program and for Elijah we'll be in the Level 2 workbooks.

History: Story of the World again! History is my favorite subject and I loved using this curriculum last year. Each week the kids listen to a chapter or two from the audiobook (it's nice to have a break from talking/reading all day long) and do an accompanying activity or two from the activity guide. This year we'll be studying the Middle Ages - Medieval Times and the Georgia Renaissance Festival here we come!

Science: I've cobbled together our science curriculum from a variety of resources. We'll be studying Earth Science (geology, weather patterns, air, water, light, biomes, etc.) this semester and astronomy next semester. The plan is to cover one subject each week using library books, Magic School Bus videos (so fun) and of course hands-on experiments. I'd like to take field trips to the Telus Museum and Fernbank as well this year.

A note about field trips: Lots of museums offer discounted homeschool days and most offer some kind of discounted day throughout the month. I make a note of which days those are at the places I know we want to go each year and manipulate our schedule so we can take advantage of that offer.  Last year we visited the GA Aquarium for about $30 (for 5 of us) on a homeschool day and had access to a ton of additional activities and learning opportunities while there. This year Medieval Times is hosting Homeschool Day on September 23rd...who wants to come with us?! 

Phew! I think that covers most everything. I'd love to hear from any of you who are planning to homeschool this year and what your plans look like! 

Kids Cooking School

Even though homeschooling is officially over til September, over the next few weeks the kids and I are going to spend some intentional time each day learning together.  Instead of math, writing and reading, we'll be tackling cooking, cleaning, art, woodworking and dinosaurs. The idea is to use this time when we don't have school work going on to focus on learning some life skills. (Okay so the dinosaur topic was the kids' idea and knowing a T Rex from a Stegosaurus is not exactly a life skill, but we're going with it.)

We're starting in the kitchen by learning a few basics. Just some simple things that will give them confidence and lend a (HUGE) hand to BJ and me throughout the day.

This week we're tackling the following:

1. How to crack an egg
Elijah can crack an egg, but my 5 and 4 year old are definitely old enough to learn as well. It's a little thing, but it takes practice and this year when we've baked together I've been too irritated to slow down enough to teach this simple thing to them. 

2. How to make a sandwich.
It's the spreading that causes all the trouble and really, this is just another practice thing. I've been too much of a neat-freak to really let them make the mess that learning requires, so I'm going to be intentional about letting go of my clean countertop and letting them do it themselves. 

3. How to wash and cut an apple, a carrot and a strawberry.
These are their favorite fruits and veggies that require "prep" and it would be huge for them to have the knowledge to serve themselves healthy foods. (And for me not to have to help every time someone wants a snack!) 

4. How to turn on the stove-top and use the built-in griddle to cook grilled cheese, hot dogs and quesadillas.
So this is a little more advanced/dangerous, but they are all old enough to understand the directive, "DO NOT do this without Mom or Dad around" so I think we're good. Since the above foods are their favorite dinners and they are all made on the stovetop, I figure the pay-off is worth the risk. Knowing how to make your favorite dinners is really winning at life isn't it? 

5. How to make Rice Krispy treats.
Dessert that doesn't require anything but a bowl and the microwave. I don't think you need this explained further. 


On Friday night they'll show off their skills by making our whole family dinner. The kids currently think Skills School is "so awesome". We'll see if they feel the same way next week when we tackle Cleaning!

What Life-Skills could you teach your kids this summer?

School's Out For Summer! (A Homeschool Wrap Up Post)

The finish line is in sight. Tomorrow will be our last day of school for Elijah! Woo hoo!! Cue the parade and throw some confetti up in the air for good measure.

We survived. There were delightful days and there were dreadful days. Mostly our days flitted from misery to mundane to magnificent. I am getting the picture from other homeschooling moms that that's pretty normal.

It was not the idyllic year I had aspirations it would be. There were tears (his and mine) over reading books. There were arguments and bribery to get work done. After Christmas break, Jude dropped his nap and things got really messy. Suddenly I had a toddler on the loose all morning, intent on destroying everything my big kids were working on in the schoolroom. Truthfully, it has been hard most days.

BUT - Elijah can read. That's a pretty big deal for me, so I'm going to say it again. Elijah is reading. He could read this sentence without trouble. He could even spell most of the words in the previous sentence nearly correctly. I can't even express how HUGE that has been for us. I started the year off with 6 year old who had trouble consistently sounding out words like can, bad and stop. This now 7 year old still doesn't like to read, but he can. And for a mama who considers herself a bibliophile, that has been a bitter pill to swallow. It has been a learning process for the both of us. For me, accepting that I need to lower my expectations and for him to fight through something that doesn't come easily.

As a family we read, read, read. Roald Dahl was a favorite this year. We read James and the Giant Peach, Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, The Great Glass Elevator and the B.F.G. We finished two more Little House on the Prairie books, leaving us with just the last book in the series to go! We read the first Harry Potter book and started in on the Boxcar Children series just this month.

We sped through the first grade Singapore Math curriculum and finished in April. I don't think I spent enough time appreciating that it came easily. Personally, I loved figuring out how best to communicate the concepts of number families, regrouping and multiplication to E.

We discovered the Ancient world, from the early civilization of Mesopotamia to the fall of the Roman Empire. We tried our hand at writing hieroglyphics, built siege towers out of Legos and created a working aqueduct model to bring our knowledge of Roman engineering to life. Our schoolroom is now decorated with a timeline that covers the perimeter of the room documenting our knowledge.

We visited the Georgia Aquarium, went to the Chattahoochee Nature Center and toured the Atlanta Zoo all this fall during our study of the animal kingdom. During our study of the human body we used bread to discover what happens inside our digestive system- a graphic lesson I don't think me or the kids will ever forget! We planted seeds and learned a lot about (how to kill) plants during our spring-time study of all things green. (I'm truly grateful my mother-in-law has been able to teach them how to actually grow a plant.)

Most importantly there was so much play. So many hours spent in pretend castles, role-playing family and heroes and re-enacting their favorite story lines again and again. On nice days we went to the park, on cold days we sat with our books in front of the fire.

We had time to lay in the grass and watch clouds move across the sky. We had time to visit my grandmother during the final months of her life. We were able to leave on a dime and go on a "field trip" to Greenville SC when BJ had to travel for work. Slowing down to enjoy these moments with the kids does not come naturally to me, so for us homeschooling has been a gift. In a 12 hour day at home, I end up snatching a few priceless minutes with each child just because there's so much time on our hands.

So yes, we will be staying at home again next year. I'll have a Kindergartener and a 2nd grader, a pre-Ker and a 2 year old. Let the summer fun begin!